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During WW2 an army patrol became lost in the desert. They were very low on food and water, so the Captain asked for a volunteer to go on ahead and scout for provisions. Private Smith stepped forward immediately. 'I'll go Sir, I was a poacher before the warso I'm good at sneaking around for grub!'
The Captain ordered the men to give Private Smith as much of their remaining food and water as he could carry, and the ex-poacher set off across the sand.
He made his way north for seven days, sheltering as best he could when a sandstorm blew, and taking cover whenever any of Rommel's troops went past. On the morning of the eighth day, Private Smith climbed to the top of an enormous dune and paused to catch his breath. Looking down, he was astonished to see a small oasis with a single large tree growing on the bank! Smith scrambled down the dune and plunged into the cold, clear water, drinking his fill and splashing around with joy. When he had refilled all his water bottles, he went over to the tree for a closer look. To his surprise, there were things hanging from the branches that looked like chunks of BOILED BACON!!! Smith cut a piece off with his bayonet and gingerly took a bite...sure enough, it was bacon, slightly salted and cooked to a turn. Excitedly, he filled his rucksack with as much bacon as he could carry, and set off south to rejoin his patrol.
Eight days later, the sentries spotted Smith staggering towards them, and rushed out to help him into the camp. 'Captain! Captain!' he cried, 'Eight days march north from here, I found an oasis with a BACON TREE growing next to it!'
The Captain and the other ranks scoffed at this, saying that Smith must be mad from sunstroke, but when he opened his rucksack and passed round the chunks of meat from the tree, they had to believe his incredible tale.
'Right men, strike camp and head north on the double!' yelled the Captain, and soon the patrol were marching excitedly north towards the oasis and the incredible BACON TREE.
Eight days later, the soldiers reached the final sand dune and crawled exhaustedly to the top. Sure enough, below them was the oasis, the cool water glinting in the sun, and next to it...the amazing BACON TREE! With cries and cheers, the soldiers scrambled madly down the dune towards the oasis, but before they could get near the water an incredible thing happened...from out of the tree dropped fifty German soldiers with machine guns, who opened fire and slaughtered every last one of the poor British troops.
As it turned out, it wasn't a BACON TREE at was a HAMBUSH
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